Friday, April 13, 2012

The promise of tomorrow

Tomorrow's the 14th.  This may mean nothing to most people.... but to me it means everything.  Two months ago Declan passed away.  Two months ago our hearts were ripped out and stomped on.  Two months ago we prayed for a miracle.  Two months ago.... I can hardly believe that.  Saying "two months ago" seems like the time has just flown by.... but then I think to the actual day, the funeral, the aftermath of that first week and it all seems like forever ago.  Time is so funny because in the moment, time drags on.  There are days when I can't believe how slow the hands on the clock are moving, but then before I know it, another week has passed by and we are once again upon a Tuesday, I get my morning "thinking about you today" text from a dear friend and I spend the rest of the day thinking about Declan....thinking about his life and his death.  Wondering what the future holds... wondering what my family will be like in a year, two years.... the future is so uncertain and is no longer something I count on having.  I continue to be amazed at the uncertainty of life... no one is promised tomorrow.   As I get ready for bed, I have to remind myself to be thankful for the day I was given... thankful that, although two months ago Declan passed away, he continues to live in my heart and thankful of the promise that I will see him again.... maybe not today or even tomorrow, but someday.

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